Tuesday, May 14, 2013

Dealing with being motherless

Whenever you lose something you'll always miss it, whatever it was. But when you lose something without even knowing what it was, like an unwrapped present that you left somewhere, you'll forget about it. It's just a matter of time. But what do you do when you lose someone without knowing him or her? someone like . . . . .your mom.

First of all, congratulations to all moms in the world in this month when you all have a well deserved celebration. Especially to those single mothers that have overcome situations and raised their children on her own effort, as when the father also "divorces" his children. And to those that still are fortunate to have their mother, spoil her on "her day," because many of us, no matter how much we want to do it, we can't or we won't be able to do (RIP). 
         Based on events and places that I remember and that I have been able to revisit or verify, my memory goes back to when I was four years old. I remember being in different places and with different people. And in none of those events or places do I remember seeing my mother.
        Growing up to five to six years old, I always wondered my mother's whereabouts. But I never asked my Dad, my superman, because I always thought that it would probably be disrespectful to him. So I get to this point in my life now where people ask me,"what about your mom?" or "is your mom still alive?"  People sometimes don't think about the way they ask questions, "you don't know your mom?" and things like that. Maybe that's why I keep remembering her. Otherwise, I probably would have forgotten about her by now. I remember asking my aunt and my uncle about her and they always told me that she used to go to their house, but always when I wasn't around. And time has passed. Now at my age, I have no hope, maybe not even the interest to know who and where my mom could be or if she is still alive.
             I don't even have the slightest memory of my mom, all I could see it as was my Father. He has now passed away, something that really, really debasted it me. My superman died. The last time that I had the opportunity of seeing him and talking to him, he told me that he wanted to take me to where my mother supposedly lived. But he was really in bad shape by then and traveling was not an option. So I just told him plain and simply, " I don't have and I have never had a mom; all I have is you, my father." He cried a lot that day. But I told him not to worry, that I was fine and at peace with my mom; that I didn't hold anything against her, but it was just not in me, nor did I have any interest in looking for her or knowing her. And that was the end of it.

Now, being motherless is not easy. Let me tell you that in my opinion, "moms" are the soft side of the family, as I have been able to see in some of my friends and other people that I've known throughout my life. The side that I never had. They (moms) are the ones that grant most of the things in the house, the ones that defend the children, the ones that cover for them when they do something wrong, the ones that cry, the ones that interfere for them. In other words, they're the "angel" of the family. And I happen to know that through information, not because I have lived it. That is what makes the difference between me with no mom and all the fortunate ones that still have her.   
           My friend Memo (Guillermo) cried in one occasion when "mother's day" was about to be celebrated. He asked me, "Martin, don't you feel sad because you have no mom to celebrate on such a special day?" and my answer was so upsetting to him that it made him cry. I said "what do you want me to feel? I have never celebrated that day before in my life. To me it's like 'Monday,' nothing to be happy about, other than the fact that I have to thank God for allowing me to live one more day."  Memo cried at that moment and said, "how can you be so cold about it?" What he couldn't see at that point was that I was accustomed to live without a Mother, not that I didn't ever need one; but I had the  Super Father that knew how to make me feel fine being Motherless.
      I've always encouraged my son and daughter to love, respect, take care of, and pay a lot of attention to their Mother because She is the best they have, because there's nothing like the love of a Mother. And let me suggest the same to all of you that have the fortune of still having your mom- Don't wait until each May 10th, or each second Sunday of May.

           Let's keep writing! and thanks for keep reading my stories, I'm really happy to look back and see the amount of stories that I have published and all the ones that are coming. So stay with me, be patient, and little bye little will we'll get to more and more stories. For now, eat your fruits and vegetables and don't forget some dessert too. Over n' out.  

The greatest pictures for this story my grandson, and as for the perfect picture for mother's day my two beautiful princess

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